How do you say “I’m retired” without saying it? Simply be patient when you are faced with a delay. Early retirement changes our relationship with time and people seem to notice right away.
I made a couple stops the other day that proved this out. I was at the dental office and the hygienist said the dentist was going to be delayed a little bit. He had another patient with something urgent. I simply said, “No worries. I’m not in a hurry.”
I could tell she was immediately surprised by my response. I wasn’t checking my watch or responding to emails after 5 minutes went by. She said, “No appointments this morning? Are you off work today?”
“No”, I said, “I don’t work. I just have lunch with a friend at noon today.” That got her very curious: “You don’t work? That sounds terrific! How long have you been retired?” I said it had been over 7.5 years now and that we’ve been very blessed to have extra time.
A similar conversation happened at the local storage garage place. I was taking care of an insurance request for my parent’s storage unit and the manager was having a hard time with new software they were using. It was just a 5-10 minute delay, but he too was surprised by my patience.
I often say that when one retires, you transition from focusing on time efficiency- squeezing as much productivity out of each minute as possible – to really savoring time and better living in the moment. Delays are less stressful when you don’t have a dozen things that need to be done at work.
Having the time to wait – and maintain your good attitude – is a core benefit of early retirement. How has your relationship with time changed in early retirement?
Image: Pixabay
MrFireStation 
Two big differences.
I notice a big difference in my driving as I am not in a hurry, so I actually drive the speed limit and I am able to avoid driving when I know there are going to be traffic jams (especially around schools).
I also seem to notice and appreciate more that I am married to a really attractive wife. She asked me the other day, “Why now?” Me: “We are not running rushing to work and from one kid event to the next.”
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Funniest comment ever!
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My question is, why are we in such a hurry even when we are not in retirement? What are we afraid of? That we won’t finish 1 more thing that in 24 hours we probably won’t even remember what that one more thing is. Wouldn’t it be better if we took just a little time out of our day to Enjoy the moments, Showing someone kindness, volunteer somewhere for someone or something. We could get that extra time by putting down our phones for 5-10 minutes a day is all it would take. I remember when I was in Honduras we were building a water system along side of the Honduran men. One day we just had a few more feet to do to finish this section but it was 5pm quitting time, all the Gringo’s (as we were called) wanted stay just 30 minutes longer. The Honduran men said no it is quitting time and this same dirt will be here tomorrow.. They realized that the value of getting home to their families was more important then finishing the 30 minutes of digging. There is always going to be just one more section! As I challenge myself to value what is a priority and enjoy the moments! Don’t wait until you retire to be patient and kind, start now!
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“Wouldn’t it be better if we just took a little time out of our day to enjoy the moments?” – Very well put, Jeff! Your story about Honduras reminds me of this tale posted in most Jimmy John’s locations … https://mrfirestation.com/2015/03/14/how-much-is-enough-jimmy-johns/
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Maybe my waitperson is rushing around covering too many tables, or (similar to your example) I am wait wait waiting in the dental office, or perhaps someone apologizes for making me wait — in such cases, I often just say “No worries, I am a low-stress customer”. Plenty of factors go into that, but certainly one of them is being retired — early. Quite often, whoever I am dealing with gives a little nod and smile, or says “Thanks, you get it”
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Agree – they all appreciate “low-stress” customers. I’m afraid they encounter too few of them in a normal day.
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I agree, driving. I was always an efficient driver with allowing the car to slow down without breaks when the light ahead turns yellow, but I am more of a slowpoke on the road and I let people go first.
Last week I allowed someone to go ahead of me for coffee at the airport as I always arrive very early with a book in tow.
I am much less efficient with time given that I have much more of it and tend to delve much deeper into a subject that I would normally because….I can.
I also find there is more time in my consulting practice that I don’t bill for because it is extra research/review. I don’t call it work as if it was work, I wouldn’t accept the assignment. I find that my billable hours are less than they could be.
Like Mick Jagger says Time is on my side….Yes it is.
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Agree – I’ve always been a bit of a speedy driver, but probably less so now than when I was working / in a hurry.
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